There aren’t many references out there on social skills for adults, if you do a web search, you’ll only find stuff about how to make kids develop socially. But what if you’re already all grown up and aren’t too happy about your own social skills?
Maybe you were too shy when you were growing up and this just inhibited you from going outside and playing with the others kids; this of course didn’t allow you to get the necessary amount of socializing to develop a good social intelligence and good social skills.
Ultimately, to get ahead in life we need to deal with other people effectively, and there are ways to improve your skills in this area regardless of where you’re at in your life.
Whatever age you are right now, working on your social skills only stops the day you die. We live surrounded by other people and to make the best out of life; the mastery of this skill is completely necessary.
If you think in terms of “I’m too old to try new things out” then you’ve already lost the battle. Get over your own limiting ideas and be willing to work on your social skills. All it really takes is willingness to be embarrassed from time to time, can you take that? If so, let’s go on.
I’m not exactly at the social peak of my life but before I started working on my social skills I would go out with friends about twice a year. Yes, 2 times in 365 days.
Nowadays I go out at least 3 times a week and have multiple social groups, does this mean I have excellent social skills? No, but it certainly means I am constantly pushing my comfort zone and working my social muscles.
Going out and socializing is what gets the job done; social intelligence develops as you get a better feel for every different social situation you’re in. You don’t grow big muscles by reading about it on the internet, even if you know exactly the perfect movements for the most effective workout of your big guns; nothing’s going to happen if you don’t get moving.
This is one of those little “life hacks” because the more you face those awkward social situations, the more confident you’ll get. The attitude behind it is that you become fearless about ever feeling awkward in a social situation, not just embarrassing yourself for the sake of it.
After you’ve survived those awkward situations you’ll start trusting yourself more and more, it will give you more confidence to take ballsy decisions.
Fear is a huge limitation for us all, especially socially speaking; taking an attitude where you think “I might get and feel embarrassed, and it’s ok” is an awesome way to actually reduce your fear a whole lot.
As men, our self-concept is highly tied up to our relationship with the opposite sex. Start by talking to the cutie in the bar and exposing your real personality to her, risk being rejected, learn that it’s ok if you get rejected, think highly of yourself and this will make you grow in confidence.
That's just an example; just start being more spontaneous and ballsy with your socializing and it will all fit together perfectly. Make a list of the things you'll start doing to improve in this sense.
All of the advice offered in this site applies to everyone, social rules are universal and you can apply them whether you’re 50 or 15.
Learn these Social Skills for Adults:
It’s not actually.
What’s actually hard is getting over ourselves, after a lifetime of learning that you shouldn’t stand up for yourself, be extroverted and influence others. You make the “wrong connections” in your mind; your view of the world becomes biased by what you think things should be.
All of the work is done when you have successfully “rewired” your brain to make the right associations.
For example: Yesterday I went partying, at the end of the night I was with this girl in her car. I tried kissing her and she rejected me. A couple years ago I would be devastated and think I’m a loser. Nowadays; I actually think she’s the loser for backing off.
You can train your mind to make correct, empowering and confidence building associations. It’s never too late.
In the end, the social skills for adults, the social intelligence, the confidence, the success with women, everything. Comes when you decide to train your social muscles. Go out and get social.