There are many common misconceptions around what positive self talk is about. I used to think that being positive was about being someone like Ned Flanders; the Simpsons character.
If you’ve ever watched the show you know what this character is like: A Ridiculously nice, sickly-sweet, lame and meek guy. It was the basic representation of what someone who wasn’t cool would act and look like.
Turns out I was wrong; no kidding. Actually the happiest people in the world keep a positive attitude and they’re nothing like Ned Flanders.
Bad things also happen to negative people, bad things happen to everyone.
Bad things will always happen, as well as good things. The difference is that people who are happy and positive carefully choose what thoughts linger in their minds.
For example, ask yourself this question: “What bad things have happened this week?”
Now, ask yourself once again: “What good things have happened this week?”
In general, it’s much easier to recall the bad things than the good things. In most positive people the good stuff stays in their minds for a much longer time.
Your perception of things that happen is always biased by your outlook on life. Things will always happen objectively, interpretation makes them a negative or positive thought.
For example, a couple months ago my uncle got everything in his house stolen; TVs, microwave oven, money he kept there, his shotgun, jewelry, etc.
That’s a purely negative event, right?
Well, it is, bad stuff happens all the time. However, my uncle was out while his house was getting robbed. If he had been home at the time he might have got killed, you could call the whole event a close call and that thank God nothing that would affect his life happened.
Interpretation is all, what do you choose to focus on and what lingers in your mind the most; your positive self talk or negative self talk can completely influence your life.
Point being that even when bad things happen you choose what stays in your mind and that if you set yourself to by default think positively some other areas of your life will be improved.
Alright, so bad things happen and you can even take the best thoughts out of completely bad things, but what’s the point?
Depression, low self-confidence, no self-trust, anxiety, etc. They all come from negative thought patterns.
I’m not just saying this to be airy-fairy about positive energy and stuff like that. These things genuinely make you feel certain emotions that can make you anxious and depressed. Those chemicals that make you feel like that come from your mind.
All of our emotions have their origin in our brains; and these emotions are born in our thoughts.
What you think will make you feel a certain way or the other. Ever thought of how confidence is merely an emotion? Ask any cocaine addict how he feels when the drugs make his brain produce dopamine, you guessed right, extremely confident.
Our recurring thought make us form a self-concept and feel either good or bad.
Even when it doesn’t make any sense to be addicted to feeling sorry for yourself for example, we get hooked on either bad or good emotions and this is why we always recur to the thoughts that reinforce this self-concept and make us feel those emotions.
Imagine being addicted to self-empowering thoughts, you’d constantly be recurring to those thoughts and this would completely change your confidence and outlook in life!
People who are naturally positive came to be this way almost by accident, unless it’s someone who came to this topic from a self-development perspective; the way you think was probably taught to you by external influences like your parents or friends.
You are not positive or negative, you just learned to think either way.
Making a switch from having a negative mentality to having a positive self talk mentality begins simply by changing the way you think and carefully picking what lingers in your mind.
You have the choice to ramble on negativity or shift your focus to positivity.
If you ever expect things to come naturally things will just continue to happen the way they’ve been happening.
CHOICE is what makes things happen, being proactive about what you want and getting it. You must DO to get the results you want.