Having love shyness can actually be one of the main motivators for any guy to start working on improving his social skills. Surely at some point any guy wants to be part of a relationship, get a girlfriend, get married, form a family or just get some female attention in general.
Not having this part of your life handled can actually make a man feel like less of a man – it sure did for me. Being shy with girls led me to a lot of frustration and alienated me from the joy of enjoying female presence.
If you’re reading this article then you most likely want to stop having love shyness and you’re probably wondering if it’s possible or not.
I grew up around boys mostly, always hung out with two of my cousins and our role models were our fathers. It was a pretty masculine environment if you may call it that.
We were taught that women were awesome and developed a real appreciation for the feminine.
However, in my case I was a bit shy and so kind of were both of my cousins. Not having many girls my age around me growing up didn’t really allow me to ever get to feel comfortable around girls.
My older cousins and uncles would always put social pressure on me to go talk to the girls and put a spotlight on me whenever a girl my age was around. I felt really embarrassed because I didn’t know how to talk to girls and I wasn’t really comfortable doing it.
If I ever did show any interest in a girl or actually got the nerve to talk to one; it would usually be followed by comments like “WAY TO GO GARYYYY!” making me even more uncomfortable and embarrassed.
To all those upbringing issues, add the fact that I wasn’t really good talking to anyone in general and that I had developed social anxiety.
Boom! You’ve got probably one of the worst cases of love shyness in the history of human kind. I’m pretty sure a lot of guys can relate to this.
How to get over the fear of girls:
First thing is to have a clear vision of what you want and never lose the big picture. Think about it, what do YOU want? Don’t be scared of showing what you want.
It’s ok to feel attraction for women and to show it, it’s normal and it’s a natural part of being a man. Don’t be embarrassed of showing interest directly to women or showing others that you are attracted to one.
Fear of girls usually just makes you want to get that one special girl, get comfortable with her and then keep her forever. And there’s nothing wrong with that.
However, I would recommend getting some experience before jumping into trying to get a relationship with the first girl you talk to. Women are usually attracted to guys who have an abundance of options, as usually any pretty girl will have an abundance of options herself.
The process will involve getting some experience first; don’t take anything (rejections) personally.
Look at it objectively:
The point of all those facts is that you see things objectively and remove girls from a pedestal. Once you realize that girls are not better than you, you can start overcoming your love shyness.
Make some female friends:
The easiest way to get comfortable around feminine energy is to get female friends. Some guys have them and some don’t. I sure didn’t have any female friends and it was part of why I felt so intimidated by female energy.
It will help you A LOT getting some female friends. Plus, female friends have more female friends and that’s a perfect opportunity for you to meet more women.
Building confidence and perspective about girls:
If you’re having love shyness; you want to solve your romantic problems with women and this is always a matter of making her feel attracted to you.
Girls will usually feel attraction for you or they won’t. Attraction is not a matter of looks or money, but rather a matter of personality and confidence.
Building confidence around girls is what will make them attracted to you. It doesn’t have to be flashy; you don’t have to be James Bond or anything. Like I said before; being normal is usually enough.
Practice will make perfect and will give you the hold of how interacting with women is slightly different than interacting with guys, and interacting with women is actually a lot easier.
Getting over being love shy is oftentimes about getting a realistic perspective on your real value as a man and getting girls off that unreachable pedestal you’ve put them on.
Picture yourself as a big bear and her as a tiny cute rabbit; this is an analogy that relates more to the reality of the situation. They’re harmless and they’re just waiting for you to be normal, talk with them and have fun.
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