A big chunk of the world’s population has an introvert personality; this is also my case. Social Success Mastery’s articles constantly encourage readers to take on extrovert characteristics and be more outgoing as a way to achieve social success.
It’s kind of contradictory that I encourage people to be extroverted, yet tell them that being their true self is what will make them very confident. This basically tells you that if you’re not naturally extroverted then you’re screwed!
This article is meant to be that missing piece in the puzzle and take care of those common contradictions of having an introverted personality and achieving social success.
False, no one is totally introverted or totally extroverted. It’s a spectrum and you’re placed somewhere in there in one of the grays. It’s also not static, it changes from situation to situation, in some situations you’re more extroverted in others more introverted.
Truth being that it’s not a black or white thing; you’re never totally introverted or extroverted.
False, I think this is the most common misconception. Usually shy people are introverted, but I’ve met extroverts who are shy.
Being shy has a lot to do with a lack of social confidence.
This is one of those contradictions I used to have in my mind all the time when I started my social success journey. As a natural introvert I used to think that shyness was in my genes.
If that were so, it would make social confidence incompatible with introversion - and this would also make social success incompatible with introversion.
Reality: You can be introverted and have good social skills; you can be introverted and socially successful.
This is partially true, society is basically designed to make extroverts stand at the top of the social ladder and disregard the more quiet fellows.
It’s become sort of an extrovert dictatorship.
However an introvert who has achieved a certain level of confidence/social success/has learned to be a cool guy is at the “level” of any extrovert out there.
There’s no reason to believe that having an introvert personality means that there’s something wrong with you. But society is designed to make you think so.
Since usually society asks you to be outgoing we tend to think that being introverted is bad. Introversion actually is a very good quality.
You get to have:
Having an introverted personality is NOT bad!
Socially this means that you have a tendency to be critical and insightful, this most times can be translated into not being overly expressive of your emotions and not reacting quickly to want the masses are thinking. You can remain pretty centered in most situations and this can be used to your advantage socially.
There’s a bunch of examples of introverted socially successful guys, usually those guys aren’t saying much but everyone’s telling them stories because they what their approval, they are controlling to social situation by simply being there.
Of course, to achieve this “level” you got to go through that “try-hard” stage where you’re actively going out to practice your social skills, it is continuous effort but you’ve always got to be working towards social success.
Here’s a great video on the good side of having an introvert personality.