How to find a girlfriend – 7 Steps to the Girl of your dreams

Wondering how to find a girlfriend was the main thing that brought me to the place I am now, have you ever felt like you’ll never meet anyone special that likes you just for you? That girls are never interested in you or that the ones that might be interested are not the ones you want? That whenever you get a crush on someone it just ends terribly for you with barely anything happening between you and her? Then you are standing right where I was a couple years ago.

Being a shy guy can somewhat screw over your chances of finding a girlfriend or getting any other kind of attention from girls, but it all can change, and you can make it happen.

First things first, if you want to learn how to find a girlfriend you’ll need to find girls.

1. Finding girls:

It’s kind of obvious, yet it’s hard to realize. If you want to find a girlfriend you’ll need to put yourself around the type of girls that you would want to date. Yet, most times we fail to see this and just hope for the girl to magically come walking into our lives as if LIFE was some kind of Disney movie.

Ask yourself the following questions:

  • Do I really know how to find a girlfriend?
  • What kind of girlfriend do I want?
  • Where would this type of girl like to spend her free time?
  • Could I go to any of these places to meet these girls?

The answers to those questions will make the idea of the girl you want pretty clear for you, and this will allow you to screen for girls that suit your personality better, and then figure out an action plan. Once you know what you want in a girl you can actually go out there and find her instead of just settling for the first girl that gives you the time a day and ending up in a crappy relationship.

Desperation is bad, but once you have a clear idea of the girlfriend you want to find, you can actually discard the girls that don’t meet those ‘standards’ and go for your best options.

2. Social groups:

Social groups are where MOST people meet other people; it’s a great way to meet girls and a great way to find a girlfriend.

You should always try to expand your social circle, it’s cool to hangout with your close knit friends but if you are trying to find a girlfriend you should actively be trying to get yourself in new social situations.

This means you should sacrifice this Friday’s pizza, FIFA, and beer night with your usual buds to attend ‘Mike-from-work’s’ birthday just for the sake of expanding your social circle and putting yourself in the situations in which you’ll meet girls.

Even if you don’t meet any girls that you like at mike-from-work’s birthday, you might meet mike-from-work’s other friends and get invited to other events where you’ll meet girls you like and get a clear idea of how to find a girlfriend.

3. Approaching girls:

Society tells you not to talk to strangers and bother them, but guess what? Society lies a bunch of times, what if I told you that you can just go up to any cute girl and talk with her?

Sounds scary, right?

Well it is, but it’s an AWESOME way to meet girls and one of the BEST ways to improve your confidence.

All you have to do is:

  • Open: Go over and talk to her (basically the hardest part), say anything: ‘hi my name is *fill blank*’, ‘hey, I thought you were cute and I had to come talk with you’.
  • Hook: Make good and attractive conversation with her, ask her for her name, ask her what she’s doing, be light hearted, don’t take yourself too seriously, don’t take her too seriously, joke around, and enjoy the awkwardness of what you’re doing with a charming smile.
  • Go for the number: If it all goes well tell her ‘hey, you seem cool, give me your number so we can hangout sometime’.

Confidence is key for cold approaching to start working, but once you’ve done it enough times and get comfortable with it, it becomes second nature.

For some people this could sound bizarre, but then again there’s people posting their pictures online and deciding who to date by swiping left or right without having had a real conversation with that person before.

Rejections = Confidence. Success = Confidence and dates.

It’s a win-win situation; you can try it at parties, nightclubs, events or walking around the street at daytime.

4. The long term fix might not be getting A girlfriend:

If you are a shy guy wondering how to find a girlfriend it’s probably because you are somewhat clueless and confused, like I was. All I wanted was a cute girlfriend that liked me for me, but in the long run I learned that the reason I didn’t know how to find a girlfriend was that I needed to learn and work on myself first.

Yes, you CAN find a girlfriend while being shy; you don’t have to completely transform into Mr. Socialguy to get a girlfriend, but if you want to have choice and increase your chances by becoming a guy that is expressive of his personality, confident and that gets the stunner that he wants; then there’s work to be done.

How to find a girlfriend – Positive Changes that increase your chances:

Learn to have fun by yourself:

Lots of people go out there looking for someone to fill their empty cup, they want to feel complete by having some else’s approval. What’s curious about this is that what makes you have an attractive personality is walking around with a full cup and sharing it with others.

This is why an important step is feeling happy by yourself. Having fun by yourself is underrated, as if someone else looking at you makes it possible for fun to exist.

Laugh at your own jokes, practice sports that you like, enjoy life, get into funny situations just to begin having your own fun.

Become more comfortable around people:

If you are anything like me, you usually have a hard time having a conversation with males and females. Finding a girlfriend as a way of finally finding comfort with someone is not necessarily the best strategy. However, getting comfortable with people in general will suddenly make you more attractive to girls in general.

How to make friends

Become more comfortable around girls:

Aside from being more comfortable around people, it’s important that you learn how girls work and girls have the answer to how to find a girlfriend.

Not necessarily because they’ll give you the best advice, but because:

  1. You’ll get comfortable around feminine energy.
  2. You get to know how girls really think.
  3. Girls are friends with other girls.

5. Learn how to flirt:

Once the basics have been laid down, it’s time to get to action. Flirting is basically playing with sexual tension, a smile, some good eye contact, some double meaning comments, it’s art basically.

How to attract girls

6. Grow in Confidence:

Confidence is attractive, period. Confidence comes with well-guided experience, understanding what’s going on in situations and learning how to react to them, it makes ALL girls see you as a dreamy guy.

How to become more confident

7. Start dating:

The answer to ‘how to find a girlfriend’ won’t come up in the first date with the first girl you meet, having options means dating multiple girls (not necessarily at the same time) and so does finding your best match.

First Date Advice

In the end, relationships happen naturally when the situation is given, you might meet a cute girl at class/work tomorrow and she could end up being your girlfriend or wife in the long run, don’t be too hard on yourself with the whole how to find a girlfriend situation, just put yourself around girls, work on the things that increase your chances, and be cool. In a nutshell; go out and get social.

What do Women Want?: The secret revealed, get inside her mind and see it yourself.

Attract Girls: All you need to know about causing an uncontrollable attraction in women.

4 Dating tips for shy guys: Work past your shyness to an incredible dating life.

Stop being Love Shy: feeling uncomfortable around women will only get you so far, get over it and start getting them interested in you.

Back to Getting a Girlfriend



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